Tiny steps
Each day is made of tiny little steps. The moments are small and seemingly insignificant.
At times, as a mom, it can feel like each of those little tiny steps add up to a pointless day where nothing was accomplished and no progress was made.
I am seeing more and more lately that each tiny step adds to the big picture in ways I cannot even imagine yet.
Each smile, each tiny nod of approval, each moment of acceptance, even in the midst of sometimes frustrating chaos, adds to the hearts of our children and the people they will become.
Each moment adds to others, and moments become days. Days become weeks and years, and years become lives. Lives made of moments that are tiny and seemingly meaningless, but so full of meaning.
My life is entering a new phase. I am entering a new place. It’s like exploring a new mountain. It’s new and awe-inspiring, and at times a little frightening. My heart aches at times with the knowledge of what was left behind. But it thrills with what is around the next bend. My steps become more sure with each tiny moment.
I know that this blog is obscure and I don’t share specifics very often. I’m sure that it seems I am just trying to be cryptic. But that’s not the case. Some things are too personal for a public venue. A person’s trials are individual and no one else can begin to truly understand what they mean. It seems almost hollow to try to share them publicly.
Also, I like to progress and move forward. I like to remember what I learned from a certain trial or time in my life, but I don’t necessarily want to remind myself of the nitty gritty specifics of what was hard for me.
So I write the lessons learned, not necessarily all the specifics of the pain that caused them.
But for the first time, truly, I am moving forward in my life with no reservation for what I want, no guarantee of anything. And it’s astonishing…all I do have as I move forward is faith that this path is right. And miraculously, I have never been happier in my life. As the earth around me begins to come back to life, I can’t help but feel the parallel in my own heart.
I am amazed this past week. In the midst of moments of sadness and moments of stress, I find myself crying, because the level of peace and contentment I feel is deeper than anything I have ever felt in my life.
Blessed am I.
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