A week of thanks

It seems that one of my many lessons, again and again, during this pregnancy is this: slow down.

When I am forced to slow down, I am forced to accept what I otherwise probably would not.

This week has again reminded me of just how much I want to be the mother I dream of being.  It’s reminded me of the little everyday things I want so badly that I take for granted and let slip.  When I have no choice anymore, it hurts more deeply to see them pass.  It’s reminded me again that nothing is so precious until it is taken away.

I find myself grateful tonight for the things that are taken for a while, because they remind me of just how badly I want them, and how much more I should cherish that which I have.

This week, I have had to slow down.  I have been taking time to work quietly on little surprises for Christmas and to just think of each of my daughters and their lives.

This week is a challenging one for Matt and I.  Every couple faces large decisions from time to time.  I’m not sure we’ve ever had quite so many mounting all at once, though.

Times like that might drive some couples apart.  But even though the decisions are stressful and will impact our future for a very long time, I find that as we trust each other enough to open our hearts and ideas, even if they are drastically different, we draw closer.  I have felt closer to Matt this week than I have in a long time.  We each feel each other’s stress and heartache.  It matters to us.

Nothing is more comforting than that loving respect and kindness.  No matter how differently we may feel, we are still together in everything.

Could I be more blessed?  I am safe and warm, with a best friend who values everything I think and daughters who forgive.

Even in challenging times, blessed, blessed am I.

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