Undeserved

My back is tweaked this morning…the product of spending hours of the night with my arm around a frightened toddler who is still trying to emotionally recover from her recent hospital stay, while turning to continually nurse a baby on the other side.  She does more chewing than nursing this week, because her teeth are coming in.

Oh, and it’s my tenth anniversary.

(Instagram is my friend lately…I haven’t had time to pick up the camera.)

Ten years.  A decade.  With the fragile and needy state of two of my babies, we won’t be going away for a romantic getaway, but we have the day off and we’re going to live it up as a family.  Though I’m looking forward to it, I am sure there will be many all-too-normal difficulties in the day.

I suppose this morning I could cry about life being unfair to me on my special day.  I could cry about not getting the day I “deserve” after ten years of marriage.

But you see, I can’t do that, because this morning, I am about as happy as can be.

I live the life of my dreams.  Beyond that…I never, ever dreamed as a girl that I could actually be this blessed, and this happy.

I have a husband who adores me, who can’t walk past me without putting his large, steady hand on my back.  I have six daughters who cling to me, love me, and love each other.  We have a loud, lively, happy home.

So as I go to dig the teething necklace out of a box somewhere, try to think of new ideas to soothe a very upset two-year-old, and throw my first of many loads of laundry into the washer this morning, I can’t even begin to think of the special, “well-deserved” 10-year anniversary I was cheated.

I can only marvel at the undeserved, yet mercifully given, life I have.

A decade of wild, deep, intense, quiet love.  A decade of trust, togetherness, and joy.

A decade of blessings.

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